What To Do When There’s Just SO MUCH To Be Brave About

Have you ever noticed that posts like this are usually written with the perspective of hindsight?  You are being encouraged by someone who has reached the depths of despair, but they’ve made it through and now it’s SO AWESOME that they persevered?

Well, guys, not this one.  I am sitting here wondering why on earth everything has to be so hard.  Why am I bothering to keep pushing myself to keep trying these new things?  I am so done with being brave.

Please note: this is NOT a post about how to deal with depression – if you have these symptoms, please seek professional help.

What to do when there's just so much to be brave about

What put me over the edge was the fact that a few people have unsubscribed.  And it’s not the fact that they unsubscribed because that just means that they aren’t the right people for what I’m writing about. It’s the fact that I’m so bothered that they unsubscribed.  I am sure that I’m going to need a thicker skin if I’m going to keep writing online.  I’m going to need to braver about putting myself out there.  Especially with the whole new cancel culture thing going on – not that I expect to be so popular I might get even noticed by the cancel culture people LOL. 

I have to be brave about so many things right now in my life that this one more thing is just too much. 

And I feel so done and not at all brave.  So sick of being brave.

So what am I going to do about it?  That’s what I asked myself this morning when I rolled out of bed on to the floor to do my stretching.  Because this is exactly why I AM writing.  Because I just freak out inside whenever a woman says “Oh, I could never do that.”  I want to encourage women to be brave by showing them that things that seem daunting can actually be pretty simple. It’s just knowing what to do to find that bravery and how to make every little bit of that bravery count.

So what to do when there’s just so much to be brave about?

The four things I do to be brave when there's just so much to be brave about

1 – Don’t rely on encouragement from others

First of all, I’m not going to post this right away.  Because the last thing I need is to be doing things just because a bunch of people told me I could.  I need to know for myself that I can do it – that this is the right thing to do.  If I depend on encouragement from other people there will be a time when someone says something unencouraging (or unsubscribes) and it will derail me completely.  You need to be brave because you know you can, not because other people tell you you can.

Please note that this is not the same as not asking for help. Ask for help if there are things that you need help with, just don’t go looking for other people to provide your courage.

2 – Be kind to yourself

Second, I’m going to be kind to myself.  This does not mean I’m going to let myself off the hook for things.  This means true self care – doing the things which make it possible for me to be brave.  For me this means eating properly and getting exercise, not because I’m trying to lose weight or be healthy but because eating right and movement makes a big difference in how I feel.  You may be different.  I’m also going to look for things I can take off my plate while I’m pushing through some other things because I tend to try to do way too much.  Maybe you need to be busier to distract yourself. 

If you are trying to be brave, do the things that help you feel stronger physically and mentally.

3 – Be deliberate

Third, I’m going to be deliberate about what I’m doing.  This blog after all has a huge section called deliberate determination.  It’s how I do all these things in my life instead of saying “Oh, I could never do that.”  That means really looking at my priorities and making a plan each day that focuses on getting the right things done while not expecting all the things to be done

I know from experience that when I am in the throes of not feeling brave is not the time to revisit my long term plans or priorities.  What I do instead is to shift a few daily things around to give myself a little breathing room. But a daily plan is important – because if you spend that time making that plan you can focus the your brave energy for the day on doing the plan instead of deciding what to do next. If you always ‘fail’ at planning – read Don’t Start by Buying a Planner.

4 – Be determined

Finally, I’m just going to do it.  This is the determination part. I will just work that plan.  I will try my best to forget about all those things that are making me feel not so brave – which is easier because I’m just doing the next thing.  I will focus on doing instead of thinking.  And I will just keep on doing.  And when things fall apart one day, I’ll just take a deep breath and figure out the plan for the next day. 

Because there’s no magic bullet to being brave.  There’s just doing.

There's no magic bullet to being brave.  There's just doing.

If you are reading this post – I was brave, and I’m even stronger because I was brave. 

You can be brave too.  Every single time you are brave you will get stronger too.

What will you do to be brave?

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